Where the Sexy People Like To Hang Out

My wife and I and our close friends — we like nice things: long, opulent meals with really good wine; craft cocktails with live jazz; 5 star resorts with private beaches; sunsets sails with champagne and skinny dipping. We’ve even been ‘those people’ who order gold leaf and serve it in champagne or martinis at cocktail parties.

We also like sex and sexy things. All of these ‘nice things’ we like, we ideally like them to have a bit of a sexy vibe to them. So, we’ve tried the ‘sexy’ things. We’ve gone to strip clubs, even researching the clubs that were supposed to be higher end or ‘couples friendly’. But they aren’t. Truth-be-told, we had a pretty good time, but they really were neither high end or couples friendly. We were imagining an environment were we could sit in a lounge area, have a cocktail and watch sexy, acrobatic dancers; and then maybe go to the champagne room for a private dance. It wasn’t this. It was a variation of this, but falling short. The clubs were a little seedy, the drinks a little watery, the dancers a little under-enthused to be there and a little quick to try to get you into the back room for a dance. It was still fun but not the indulgence we wanted.

We’ve tried a few sex clubs. We were hoping for Eyes Wide Shut. It wasn’t. Again, they were kind of fun. But not what we ideally were hoping for. The club — even the nice NYC one we tried out on a weekend trip to Manhattan — was pretty dingy and the people were friendly but not really our crowd.

We’ve tried to burlesque shows. We actually loved that. So empowering and the seedy venues were kind of part of the vibe. So, we loved it, but not the high end indulgence we continued to seek.

We tried sex expos that come to larger cities. Again, kind of fun, and a great place to get new sexy lingerie and sex toys. As we were just becoming more sexual, we loved going to these and were enamored with the huge range of displays and the thousands of people there who were open and proud of their sexuality. Our first visit — we even saw out daughter’s kindergarten teacher there in full leather gear. We loved that! But they aren’t nice, luxurious places. It’s a trade show. Useful and great stuff to see. But not an immersive experience. When one came to our hometown for the first time, we bought a weekend pass, thinking we would spend the whole weekend there — at the bar, watching shows, etc. We liked it.. but 2 hours was good. Its a shopping trip.

I get that I’m seeming like a bit of a wanker snob now. I don’t mean to, and to reiterate, these were fun experiences. But we were hoping we could find something that better combined out love of really nice opulence and our love of all things sexy.

And then we watched the TV show Madame Claude. During the premiere episode, set in Paris in the 1960s, they nailed it. They go to this speakeasy-like club — a gorgeous space with a sophisticated manager who greets you at the door. A cocktail waitress taking your order to a classically trained bartender. The seating is gorgeous with lots of space to relax and have some privacy with the people you came with. On stage — and this is the best part — there will be a jazz musician, and then a burlesque dancer, and then a stripper, and then more music. It’s not overtly and 24/7 sex. But sooooo sexy.

I want the 2021 version of this. A club to hang out with, with friends, where sexiness is kind of omnipresent but not always right in your face.

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This post was previously published on Medium.

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